I’m pretty sure that I’ve mentioned before about Matt’s obsession with all things Halo. The boy LOVES the game. Believe it or not, he beat the first game in under three months. He was five. The boy is a Halo genius. He can recite the entire monologue from the beginning verbatim. For his birthday, a co-worker of Jason bought the second game. But because I’m a mean mommy, I only allow him to play it on the weekends, so it’s taking him longer to beat it than the last one. Call me crazy, but a shoot ‘em up game isn’t exactly my idea of a good pastime for a child his age. That, of course, is where the hubby steps in and says, “He enjoys it Gennie, let him do it damnit!” Errrr….

So anyways, the child loves Halo. He eats, sleeps, and breathes Halo. He pretends that he’s Master Chief and he goes around zapping aliens all day. When we started asking him what he wanted for Christmas, the first word out of his mouth was “Halo”. He then went into a 20-minute schpeel about the various Halo toys Santa REALLY needed to bring him. Under the tree are three overpriced Halo toys. He should be happy. And if he’s not, I’m perfectly happy taking them right back to the mall and getting my $33.58 back, thank you very much.

Yesterday afternoon, we were sitting in the living room watching the 5PM news. They were showing a piece about holiday shopping and they just happened to be at Media Play on Abercorn. Matt was playing in his room, so he missed the HUGE Master Chief on tv. The hubby and I looked at each other, grabbed our shoes, and decided to take Matt to see his hero. We wanted it to be a surprise, so we didn’t tell him where we were going or what we were going for. We whispered in car about how he was going to react. I was sure that he would pass out upon sight of Master Chief. Jason was sure that he would start screaming and yelling and begging for us to buy it.

So we arrived at the store and we walk in. Off to the right of the registers, we can see Master Chief. Matt is so busy going on and on about the Han Solo life-size cutout that he doesn’t really pay attention to where we’re leading him. Finally, he stops talking and looks to where me and Jason are pointing. What happened next made me laugh and cry all at the same time.

Matt’s eyes became huge. His tiny hands slowly made their way up to his mouth, which they covered. He started walking, trancelike, to Master Chief. He just stood there, staring up at it in hero-worship. Then, out of nowhere, he squeals and starts jumping up and down. He runs over and starts running his hands all over Master Chief, inspecting his guns, his helmet…basically everything. He’s going a million miles an hour and he’s just so excited. The smile on his face was just so classic. Jason picked him up and let him inspect his head and everything else he couldn’t reach. Matt even started rubbing on Master Chief’s butt. Crazy child. I’ve never seen him happier.

We would’ve bought the damn thing had it been for sell. The first thing out of the manager’s mouth when we called to see if we could come up and take Matt’s picture with it was, “It’s not for sale!” Damnit. A few weeks ago, we had actually looked on eBay for a lifesize Master Chief, but thought that the $1000.00 most were asking was a bit much. Wouldn’t you agree? I’m seriously considering taping Matt playing the game and sending it to Bungie. I really think they’d get a kick out of it. And who knows, maybe they’ll just send Matt a lifesize Master Chief. Can you imagine the look on his face if he found THAT under the tree Christmas morning?

P.S. “How the Grinch Stole Christmas” is coming on at 8:30PM (EST) on Cartoon Network. Sit down with your child(ren) and watch it! They just don’t make Christmas cartoons like that anymore.